last weekend we went on a whirlwind trip to new jersey to find an apartment. and it's true what they say- the real estate market back east is, in fact, run by satan. so, to live where we want to live and in an apartment i can live with, that was available at the time we need it... we are paying an unbelievable amount. fortunately, i can not only live with our apartment, but i actually really like it. it's close to john's work, a quick train ride into nyc, and a place without scary steep wooden stairs (unlike every other apartment we looked at). we had an amazing time and i got to know john's cousin and his sweet family. i bet it's going to be beautiful when we move out there... and such an adventure!
we kind of bummed around a lot last saturday. the girls and i hung out and went on a walk and by late afternoon, we had to get out of the house again. so we picked up dinner and went to the park as a family. we tried a new park, and hazel played, cora slept, and john and i threw the frisbee around and ate cheese fries. pics:
I'm sitting here, nursing cora, staring at her cute little Michelin arms, and remembering how much I loved that milk-drunk hazel and her Michelin arms.
But even as I'm sitting here nursing this delicious, getting-fat, sweet, innocent baby, I'm thinking about how crappy of a night we had last night.
And that's when I realized- you only remember the good stuff.
Right now, the good is mixed in with the not-so-good, the late night nursing and rocking a wakeful baby, is mixed in with the delicious baby smell and little smiles. But years from now, I'm only gonna remember the delicious baby smell and the smiles you work so hard for, just like I only remember the good stuff with hazel.
So, for now, I'm reveling in each precious moment, the good and the bad with both my girls and their respective stages. because I know it won't last forever.
on friday, the village had an easter egg hunt & carnival for the littles. henry and briana came. hazel had a blast in the bounce house, it took me forever to get her out of it- and i introduced her to cotton candy. before we left she got her face painted like a cat. and let me tell you- i think it made her year!
on saturday and sunday we had the opportunity to watch general conference and hear from our church leaders. i was feeling overwhelmed with my added responsibilities as a mother, and i felt the spirit so strongly and know that Heavenly Father appreciates my sacrifice and loves me. i am just so grateful and feel so blessed that He has trusted john and i with these precious spirits. we love our girls so much!
hazel ate lots and lots of candy, of course.
and little cora turned a month old! happy birthday, cora!
i had a tremendous meltdown yesterday. i think the combination of sleep deprivation, not enough chocolate in the house, recovering from a cold and a uti, and a toddler who is constantly testing the limits- was just too much for me. and i may have even sent a pathetic text to john in my weak state.
I also called my mom and pretended I was okay, even though i wasn't.
and then, a tender mercy came in the form of my sister's email. she said a lot of things that i needed to hear, but one thing in particular i thought i would share: i think i need to tell you just how grateful i am for you and your example. you are wonderful and i know that God is so so grateful for you raising two beautiful daughters.
and there it was. a confirmation that my sacrifice meant more than sleepless nights and tantrums.
and then cora gave me a five-hour stretch last night. i feel like a new woman.