via my mom's computer, from 7ish years ago
8th-grade me always knew that she was going to be a nurse. 8th-grade me had a plan for the rest of her life.
20-year-old me is somewhat uncertain. and uncertainty, as you may have guessed, is not my specialty. as i think about the imminent changes that will be occurring in the next year, i am afraid. excited, but also afraid of graduating and having to look for work in this economy. excited, but anxious about john going to school. excited, but worried because i just don't know what is going to happen to us, and where we are going to be in five years. and to 20-year-old me, that is a thrilling, but scary thought. very, very scary.
but i have john, and he handles the stress of these kinds of things beautifully. so now all i have to do is close my eyes, squeeze his hand, and let him lead me on the way.
2 comments:
I am totally going through this too!!
Graduation is one of the most mixed-up times. There's that rush of freedom, that bittersweet realisation that things are changing, that swelling sense of achievement, you've done it, you've survived, that jolt in the heart when you see that some things are gone forever, and the uncertainty.
With all those playing off against each other, it's little wonder that few can think in straight lines when it comes to graduation.
Don't get me wrong, the graduate jobs market is tough. But at the same time, it's been tough for years. Whatever the media would have us believe, it's not some new thing and it's definitely not impossible either. It just takes a lot of patience and persistence. And if you've got to graduation, you're already familiar with both of those.
Graduation is all about finding your own structure, defining your own life. Until now, that's been done for you. You might relish the thought or you might be terrified of it. But that in itself is a learning experience and it's valuable.
Cliched as it sounds, graduating can feel like the fun part of your life is over but that's only true if you make it that way. Look upon graduation as an adventure, a real adventure with both highs and lows and you'll be much better prepared to deal with it.
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